Brendon Urie realizing he shouldn’t have just said “whore” during an on-air performance.
me: of a tough week
me: of a bad month
me: of a terrible year
me: of a dreadful existence
have you ever cried so hard it physically hurts your stomach because you wanted no one to hear
parents making sex jokes
grandparents making sex jokes
nine-year-olds making sex jokes
Welcome to tumblr where we go from parents making sex jokes to sassy Hitler in 0.6 seconds
my friend richie was really angry one time and he picked up a rock and threw it angrily at the ground but it actually didnt touch the ground it went straight into a gutter so he literally threw a rock at the ground and missed
*white person voice* so like are you…what like… cultur—like…what ethnic—like…what type of like—what are…where are you from?
hickeys are beautiful because they are the only time a bruise results from love and affection rather than harm
Americans: I was in Florida, I drove for nine hours, now I'm still in Florida.
#australians: i drove for nine hours #now i'm nine hours away from home #no one is here #the streets are empty #how did this happen #where has civilisation gone #i am alone in the universe #oh wait no there's an echidna it's okay
Canadians: We left Toronto 2 days ago, We are still in Ontario, food is scarce. We are lost, soon we will have to eat each other to survive, oh wait there's a tims we're good.